Where is my brain?

I don't even know where to start.

Well, power is out so I guess I should make it quick.

Won Laker (Papa Laker) asked Mary and me to come and talk to him a few weeks ago. We kept on saying we would but never got around to it. Well, yesterday we made a point to meeting with him. We weren't sure what it was going to be about - quite honestly, we thought he was going to ask for money or to build him a hut....we kinda thought he was a nice, but shady guy - but we just love him cuz he is so kind and helpful with communication....yet we thought he might be lazy and judged him because we think he might have more than one wife. Anyways, Mary, Christine (a new AWESOME volunteer - I am now Cioci) and I went to his home....he excused everyone else....and then he started telling us what he wanted to talk to us about...

His story shocked the mess out of me. I wanted to start crying. I wanted to just hold him like a little kid to comfort him. I just wanted to erase all of his memories. He told us things in complete confidence - things he didn't even want Pato to know...so I will not share what his story is...but it is one that you read about in books about Northern Uganda. He asked us for help....for counseling. He wants to live a normal life. He wants healing. Oh, God, I wanted You to hand it over to him!!!

I never thought that this would happen so personally. People I love first and then find out what happened to them. It is easier to muster the stories when you don't know them...or when you hear the stories first...it makes the relationship based off the stories...but when you love them because you know them and are in their lives daily and THEN you hear what happened.....holy moly it hurts so bad to know your loved ones went through this pain. The people I love here are my family and to know this....man, my heart hurts. I woke up at midnight last night with this on my mind and couldn't fall asleep. I am just so burdened for the healing process and not sure exactly how to proceed. I have had some training on this issue and have some great resources....but I am not just helping someone....I am walking alongside my brother. And I am still needing to set a time with Mama Gloria. I really feel burdened for the parents in all aspects. Praise new staff/volunteers are coming in to focus on the children....because Mary and I are very drawn to parent counseling, mentoring and discipleship. PLEASE pray for us on this. This is huge.

There is a part of me that just wants to say to God, "I can't do this God. I am so not equipped to do this." But then I know He has chosen me TO do this because He then can do it ALL...not me. So that is a BIG PHEW!

Today, Laloyo died. Didn't go to Tegot...and we had some good plans. So instead of whining about it we went to visit Mama Ochira (Ajok) - she has TB. I made food this morning to take with. So Mary, Christine, David, Pato and I went to visit. We eventually found her waiting to see the doctor for medication. She was off to the side just sitting there - she looked numb to life...almost a breathing corpse if that makes sense. She is NOT getting better. We walked over to her and sat down with her. Almost within 5 minutes a doctor started paying attention to her and finally took her in. When she got back the doctor told us the severity of her illness. She also mentioned how she needs to eat. See, hospitals here don't provide food so you need a family member to come and cook you food. Her whole family refuses to come and help her. So she has been eating leftovers from others if anything. She is so weak. It is totally sad that her family won't come out....it is almost like they are signing her death certificate cuz without food she can't take the medicine...and she isn't even close to being able to take the next round of meds because she is so weak. We got her some pineapple, juice, dodo, layatas, and beans...she started drinking the juice and eating the pineapple....she brightened up. As we were back in the TB ward we met another lady who had no one to help her and she was in the hospital for 5 months without food except the foods she could beg for. The food ministry we have been doing really motivates me to cook more and get food to people...so I am going to continue to make food for Ajok and this other lady. Going to continue to make food...I think it is kinda inspiring the rest of the staff to do this...David is in charge of liver and Pato helped with the layatas today....

No power and computer going to die....ha.

Can't wait to go to Tegot tomorrow...